Who I Am
by pinkluver93
Summary: You'd have better chances of winning the lottery than seeing Frylock smile.


It was a Saturday morning, and Frylock was the first up, sitting on the couch, glaring at the TV as usual. He then started reading a newspaper, filled with a variety of things, from killings to city events to...

What's this, Frylock thought aloud. A particular story caught his eye: "Man Donates Life Savings To School Science Department"  
Frylock scanned the story, showing little emotion. He gave it a simple "Hmm" and placed it on the ground, watching TV again. Soon after, Shake and Meatwad come out, wide awake.

"Good morning, Frylock." Meatwad says sing-songingly. "It's a beautiful morning, ah ah.." Meatwad sings. "Oh, good morning Meatwad." Frylock says with a careless tone and without looking back. Shake comes by the chair.

What the hell is wrong with him? Shake thinks. "Well, I'll let you have the chair for the rest of the week, and, maybe til Tuesday. I like to be generous sometimes, and I think you need the chair more than I do."

Frylock looks back at Shake, no smile. "Well, thanks Shake."

Sudden awkwardness fills the room.

"Well, I guess I'll eat some sand for breakfast, since we ain't got no food." Meatwad says, rolling away into his room.  
"Uh, wait! Wait for me!" Shake says, following Meatwad.

Frylock just sits in the chair, looking blankly at the TV.

"Maybe he's got constipation, even though he don't wanna get off the couch." Meatwad tells Shake.

"No, he's obviously been rejected by a model or something. Look at the guy! He never smiles!" They both look at Frylock, who's still looking at the TV with no emotion. "When's the last time he smiled anyway?"

"Uh, when the two of us we're going someplace like 2 weeks ago, he had this smile on his face. I don't know why though."

"Look," Shake started. "He's obviously testing us, seeing how pissed off we can get. But no worries, I have a way that we can conquer him."

Carl gets up from his couch and opens his knocking door.

"Hello, dear sir or m'am," Meatwad reads from a sheet. "Have you smiled today?"

"Its 8:30 in the morning man. Why would I be smiling unless I was wakin' up in a Hooters next to some passed out broad?"

Meatwad cuts in. "Uh-"

"Well actually I prolly wouldn't be smiling." Carl starts to chuckle. "She'd proll try to get me to support her fetus or somethin', heheheh! Just hit it and go, Meatman. Treat women like you would a car accident, except, you know, it's not as enjoyable."

"Well, I guess you have smiled today, m'am or sir." Shake said, coming up by Meatwad.

"What the hell's going on with this crap anyway? You like pushin' peace or something?" Carl asks bluntly.

"We just tryin' to figure out why Frylock's bein' a party pooper." Meatwad says sadly.

"Yeah, for once, I try to be generous, and not give him a hard time like I usually do. Instead, he acts like the living dead! You know that guy hasn't smiled in two weeks?" Shake asks Carl.

"Why should I care?" Carl starts. "Well, since you asked, I mean, he lives with you bozos, he ain't got money for food,"

"That is the truth," Meatwad cuts in.

"And to top it off, uh, he ain't exactly gettin' any action, I'm assuming. Now you know why I'm so pissed off all the time. Hookers ain't cheap."

"That's a good idea Carl! Let's go buy Frylock a hooker!" Meatwad smiles.

"No, I have another idea," Shake says.

Inside the house, Shake has pointed a gun at Frylock, making him startled.

"What the hell's wrong with you, Shake!"

"I want an explanation!"

"What!"

"You never smile, fool!" Meatwad cuts in.

"I exert my generosity to you and all I get from you is a response from an angry god." Shake says, still holding a gun.

"What the-? So you wanna shoot me cuz I don't smile?" Frylock says angrily.

Shake thinks about the insanity of the question, and lowers his gun. "Um, I don't know. Ok, look, I'm gonna be like, brutally honest with you, you ALWAYS act like you have a chip on your shoulder!"

"Well you guys always-"

"No, it's not just us, boy." Meatwad cuts in. "Why you always mope around?"

Frylock sighs. "I don't know. It's who I am. I'm not a happy-go-lucky person, I, I just don't feel like it's me, you know?"

Shake looks down. "Oh."

"But don't worry, I don't have a chip on my shoulder or anything. I don't hold grudges as long as I used to."

"Well that's good." Meatwad smiles. "I thought all along it was my fault."

Shake rolls his eyes. "Yeah, now I can get on with my day-" The gun goes off. "AH!" Shake shrieks, even though he didn't hit anyone.

Frylock laughs, smiling while he's at it.

"Oh, NOW you smile?" Shake says.

"Don't be shootin' my eye out." Meatwad says.


End file.
